Ok, so, I’m pretty sure my novel is going to remain in the YA category, so I don’t plan on having a super descriptive erotic scene, but I have neared the end of my book where shits about to go down and my main character is feeling pretty emotional. I have reached the “bedroom scene” and I’m having trouble writing it. Not because I can’t think of anything, but because I hold the knowledge that once I’m done, I will post it on my google doc and my parents will go read it. I can’t be the only one who is bothered by stuff like this. I know sex happens, I was born, I am married and I have plenty of friends who have kids or are expecting. But I’ve always been super private about my love life.
Maybe it was my upbringing, but I think I’m old fashioned in the sense that bedroom stuff stays behind closed doors. I’m not even a big fan of PDA’s and its very rare that I will kiss my husband in public, not because I don’t love him, but because it’s no ones business. Except when you’re writing a story it becomes everyone’s business. All those intimate sexy things that roll around in your head and all those really special intimate times you shared, or you read, they are all there on the paper. I still blush when I read intimate scenes in other books, whether its sex or a really good kiss, I feel like I’m intruding on their moment. I realise its a fictional story with fictional characters, and maybe I’m just REALLY weird, but I can’t help it.
I know my mom probably wouldn’t be so bothered by it, because she’s sent me some pretty steamy book recommendations, but the knowledge that my father is going to read that and then think of me writing that is… well, its embarrassing and it makes me feel self-conscious. This whole book I have been able to separate Alice from my life, Alice has written this whole book up to this point and she’s done a fantastic job. I need to get back into Alice’s head space and just write. I need to forget about everyone who might read it, and find that place. If I was my main character what would I do, what would I think, I need to be her so I can react like her. My new mantra should be What Would Alice Do? 🙂